poeticwisdom.com

Yes Mum

Yes..yes, but I am eating properly, Mum.
I do wash between my toes.
I am wearing my vest.
I only ever wear dry things.
I swear I brush my teeth, day and night.
I do shampoo my hair, twice a week.
I change my pants, and socks, daily.
I do have access to a washing machine
It’s in the room next to mine. I use it, truly.
I will use the new check pyjamas you sent, today.

No, I’m not keeping late hours.
I rarely drink, you know that.
What hubbub? Oh, that’s the hockey team coming home.
No, I never have taken drugs, I’m shocked you even ask.
And no, I don’t go out with strange girls,
Nor even normal ones, whatever they might look like.
No, I am not being facetious. Look, with my raft of debts How could I afford to go clubbing every night, even if..?
Salacious magazines? Me? When there’s real..
No, I’m not being led astray, Mum. Promise!

Love you too, Mum.

What the hell does she think I am, a monk? Get a life.